Today's Goal

Goal for today: Clear off the area where my sewing machine is so that maybe this weekend I can sew. Yesterday I cleared off my craft desk and the area around it...it feels like next time I have time to scrapbook I will actually be able to do so. I will take pictures when I get the huge box that is currently in the corner emptied and sorted.

B has taken the day off to go to the big annual village garage sale south of here. I went with him last year and enjoyed myself - more just being with him then dealing with the crowds. However he planned a guys day with some of his buddies and I'm ok with that. I have been so busy driving track meets and running boys around that I'm thankful for the time at home alone during the day today. I'm not planning to accomplish a huge project...just a little bit. Supper is basically already made as it wasn't done as much as I wanted it to be last night so I continued cooking it overnight and it's fall apart tender now. I did stop at two garage sales on the way home this morning - one just south of our house and one on my bus route. Didn't purchase much and am content. I've had a short nap, loaded dishwasher and had coffee...now it's time to be away to work on my project.

Stretch

Stretch was accepted to the Summer Scholars Program at IWU. He gets a full tuition scholarship though we have to pay room and board. He will be away for 3 weeks - earning 3 college credits taking a course on World Civilization. He will participate in a ropes course, have some field trips and experience college life. I'm so proud of him...and at the same time...facing the fact that my oldest "baby" is spreading his wings to fly.

He is understandably excited.

(He actually got the acceptance letter on Saturday after having the application mailed out on Wednesday! Monday he got a letter saying they had received his application and would be considering it over the next couple of weeks).

A Word Picture..and an Overdue Update

The sun...a glowing, orange-red orb peeking out before being covered by blue grey clouds. Later on my way home from bus route..The sun is again peeking through bathing farms, fields and trees with a golden glow while more blue grey storm clouds move in from the west. Now...early afternoon before heading back to my bus route...the rain has been gently falling for several hours. Birds are active at the bird feeders...someone once told me that means the rain will continue most of the day. The trees and bushes are budding out in brilliant shades of green...Spring has come.

******************************************************

It's been awhile since I've written and life has been as busy as normal if not more so. This is our first full week back from spring break - been a good week overall. Last night was Grief Group for Dipstick - that is the time that he and I travel to "the city" on a Thursday evening to spend time at a center for grieving children. There are adult groups but I'm not involved this time...did that when Stretch and Squirrel went through. I initially thought it would be a time for me to write/journal, read or create. Instead I'm making friends with a couple of other moms who bring their children and don't attend group themselves. We catch up on each others' lives and giggle like school girls. Last night was particularly funny...I had purchased a book and set of flash cards on American sign language so we opened it up and started working on the alphabet. What a hoot! We laughed so hard we cried. But I plan to take it back next time...and in the meantime driving home this morning I was working on my alphabet by memory. I used to know it a very long time ago and some seems to be coming back easily. Sign language is something that I remember having a longing to learn as a teen in Africa - the church we used to attend in OK had an interpreter for the services and I enjoyed watching them. I still love to watch someone sign during praise and worship time at church. So...all that to say...I'm going to pursue a half-faded dream and see what happens. I don't know why it calls to my heart but it does.

Yesterday was also Squirrel's first Academic Bowl Competition of the year. He is once again on the math team. I did not get to attend as I was with Dipstick. However his team placed 3rd out of 8 teams so I am proud of him. He blames himself for the 2 mistakes that were made - didn't go with his "gut". His next meet is on a Saturday and I will attend that one. Not sure I want to drive the bus though...we will see. Stretch went to the meet after his musical practice was over.

Wednesday I drove the first 7th grade field trip since Squirrel's accident at Christmas. This was much shorter and he had water with but I confess to still worrying a bit. Was really glad I was able to drive it even though we drivers did not participate in the career activities involved. After school he had his first track meet of the season - he did long jump and ran 3 events. I think his best event by far is the 1600meter race - ran that in just about 6 1/2 minutes. This one was at home so I was able to drive my bus route first - but it made for a long afternoon.

Over spring break Stretch and Dipstick stayed home and worked in the shop with B. Squirrel on the other hand rode with me to Ontario to visit Dad and Mom. We left on Monday and returned Wednesday night - it was short visit. However I'm glad we went. Mom seemed to know me most of the time - and had a fairly good idea who Squirrel was though she often mixed him up with my brother David. She was agitated on Wednesday morning. I really think that she needs more mental stimulation than she gets. PT refuses to work with her so everything that is stimulating is up to Dad and those who come to visit and volunteer to walk with her. She seems to love to play catch with stuffed animals and wants most everyone in the room involved while that is going on.

Friday of spring break Stretch and I made a college visit to IWU in Marion. We had a good drive down there and really enjoyed the time together as we don't get much one-on-one time anymore. IWU is one of the schools he is considering for college - expensive but most will be. And it is close enough for him to come home relatively often - or for us to visit him. Much will depend on the types and amounts of scholarships he can get. I have to believe that God will provide - as well as direct where he is to go.

The biggest thing that happened before spring break is that Stretch was inducted into the National Honor Society chapter at our high school...and he was elected vice-president of the chapter for next year. I am so pleased and excited for him.

I'd better scoot for now...this is probably enough of an update for now and it's getting to be time to head for bus route again. On the agenda for tonight is to watch Suz's kids - including the 4 month old baby and go to the grocery store. Additionally my two big projects are to plant stuff outside...and to catalog my craft supplies. Any suggestions on the later?

A week

This week (end of last) has been difficult around here at our middle school (where Squirrel attends). An 8th grade girl turned up missing early Thursday morning - initially it was thought she might be a run-away though she'd had no prior history. Her body turned up in a field less than a mile from her home late Friday evening. A 17yr old boy has been arrested and admitted to killing her...he's been charged. They had no prior relationship. ..met through facebook. She was fighting with her boyfriend and vulnerable.. .he's been kicked out of at least 2 school systems - ours and the neighboring one to the west. The visitation was yesterday.., funeral is this morning. (I would have liked to attend the visitation but it was in conflict with Dipstick's needing a ride home.) Kaylin's (the girl) bus driver was fairly instrumental in helping the police find and arrest the boy - in part due to how close he lived to her. She has been in on most of the case...including helping "her kids" on her bus deal with it. Our middle school kids - especially the 8th grade girls have really had a rough time with this.

Between that, my Mom still being in hospital and the challenges of blending a family...it was a rough weekend. I've been quiet...not even blogging because otherwise I have a tendency to get "verbal vomit"

Can't remember the last day I did laundry...it's running again this morning. Dishwasher will be running before I go back to work this afternoon. Doctor said sinus infection and infected tonsils! So now I'm on strong antibiotics hoping it will take care of it for good this time.

There's been lots I've wanted to write about this week though I probably won't remember it all. Dipstick finally has all his grades back up to passing and above...not just barely. That's a huge relief. Squirrel made it through his first choir concert without passing out this time. That was another huge relief...both for me and his choir director. I sat in the front row and watched him pretty much the entire time he was on stage. Stretch is busy as usual - preparing for the spring musical at the moment. I'm excited to see the high school perform it as it is one of my favorites of all time.

Spring is on the way...our circle of daffodils is coming up again already. I really would like to fill that entire circle in with early spring bulbs - but first have to get the daffodils thinned out and spaced in a bit better. Will probably mess with them after they are done blooming this year...just before we mow them off. Still have dreams to get spring flowering shrubs in as well as summer flowering ones. In all honesty I would really like to have flowers/shrubs, etc that bloom from early spring to late fall. I would also like to have a nice vegetable garden...we will see how things progress.

There is more to write but it's time I was away to swap laundry and load dishwasher, etc. Will try to comment on other blogs later.

Saturday doings....

3rd load of laundry in washer, 2nd load in dryer, 1st waiting to be folded. Previously clean laundry mostly folded and put away. Dishwasher has run and is now cooling to be ready to empty, reload and run again. I am now sitting down to 3rd cup of coffee...or is it 4th? Kitchen counters are tidied and wiped and Squirrel is working on a fresh batch of cookies. The headache that drove me out of bed this morning shortly after 6:30 has eased to a dull pounding instead of blinding pain. Hopefully by date time tonight it will be still less. In the meantime I will push fluids and coffee and we will see.

Last night I went with Squirrel to the 2nd Annual Middle School talent show...there is some amazing talent in our middle school. I thoroughly enjoyed it...those kids have guts. Some you could tell were really nervous but for a first time like that they did great. Driving home was not as bad as I expected - it had been precipitating since mid-afternoon so I was a little concerned. I did slide past a turn or two but nothing really major even though we were among the last to leave due to him being on the "clean-up crew". Dipstick stayed home with B...he's still having issues with his grades and getting homework turned in on time. Stretch was at the high school basketball game - he got home later than Squirrel and I did.

Other than that...things are going along pretty well. Mom is still in the hospital waiting on a nursing home placement.

Better go for now...coffee is almost finished and it's time I got started on lunch. Still need to find a movie to go to tonight...or something fun for a date.

Irreparable damage in the frontal lobe...nothing further can be regained now. Now to find a nursing home that will accept her - a challenge with the damage sustained. There's many many questions going through my mind...could this have been prevented? Should or could it have been caught sooner? What triggered the immune response that caused the damage? Is this something that can be inherited? I'm sure there's more but right now those are top...and I don't know if there are answers.

I think I'm kind of numb...but not really surprised. Just wish I lived closer.

Sitting here at the computer having my second cup of coffee...thinking I will probably need to make another pot. We were released from school early yesterday due to weather and are on a snow day today...Dipstick is on his second snow day in a row. He spent a good part of yesterday getting his unfinished homework done and is now in the shop with the other boys helping B.

The snow seems to be moving out of the area - clouds are lifting and the day is getting brighter. We probably got at least 5-6 inches in the last 24 hours with the possibility of another 1-3 today along with lots of blowing and drifting. Roads are definitely bad though we see trucks "flying" past here if they go past at all. One certainly can't put on tennis shoes and walk out to the shop though...unless one wants wet feet.

On my agenda for today is some basic housecleaning, laundry and working on shop books and medical bills. Additionally since it is a snow day I really want to get the Christmas tree down...my sister is amused that it's not down yet but I confess to having had other things on my mind. I plan to have Squirrel help me with that later today.

As far as Squirrel's cardiology appointment went...I was very pleased. The doctor spent a long time talking with us and explaining things that had to be ruled out and why. Bottom line is that there is nothing major, life threatening wrong with his heart or in his brain. Basically the rapid growth spurt he's had since last August has caused the mechanism that controls his blood pressure to not work totally correctly and he had a common fainting spell. (Technical name is neurocardiogenic syncope). It is more common in girls than boys...nothing my family does can be simple apparently. Most people with it outgrow it by the time they are 19 and treatment is usually as simple as increasing fluid and salt intake. For Squirrel this means carrying a water bottle at all time - including while at school which requires a doctor's note - and salt tablets as he does not like to add salt to his food. We do still have to have a tilt table test to confirm the diagnosis and provide background if medication is ultimately needed. I don't expect we will need to add medication because he's had no other episodes since that one. Again...while it's sad that we are left with long term damage from that one episode things could have been much worse and I'm thankful that's all we have to deal with. God has a plan even when we don't see it.

Been back from Ontario since a week ago today...had lots to process. Found myself fighting tears at odd times throughout the week...usually over stuff having nothing to do with our trip to Ontario. I'm so glad that the boys and I went...it was absolutely wonderful to see all my siblings together for just a few minutes..and to be able to get a picture. I need to remember to get it onto a disc at one of the big box stores so I can put it on the computer...as well as get copies. Traveling went well...except we got "randomly selected" for a more extended border crossing investigation. At least the roads were good and we didn't have major snow to deal with either way. Seeing Mom was definitely difficult...leaving for me was even more difficult though I know she doesn't remember. We have a new diagnosis...Beta Amyloid Primary Associated Cerebral Angiitis....not cancer though treatment options are not really any better. And it's only treatable. Having said that...she is responding to treatment at this point in time. Unfortunately she is still not able to be cared for at home...and whether or not that time will come is questionable.

Squirrel...we had his follow-up ENT appointment on the 26th. All the hearing tests were redone as was an additional one. It was a long day - and he missed school the entire day which was not fun. The outcome was that barring a miracle the hearing loss is permanent and the doctor did not really seem optimistic about a hearing aid being of any assistance. Being as what he described required surgery to install a titanium plate in his skull we are not pursuing that option. Today we see a pediatric cardiologist to see if there were any heart related reasons for his passing out. I don't want to keep hauling him to doctors but at the same time I feel that if there is a medical reason it happened we need to know so we can hopefully prevent future episodes.

We ended up having 2 snow days last month - not for snow but for ice. I was very thankful for the second one - on the 22nd - I had been in the "city" Thursday night with Dipstick and really could feel the ice on the roads coming home. We had 2 times of sliding - the second was very scary as I thought for sure I was going to lose complete control. Much urgent praying was done under my breath - especially after I realized there was already a car off in the field.

Stretch is doing fine just very busy with choir and another play. There will be just one performance of this play - written by a senior so a once-in-a-lifetime chance. In two weeks choir will be participating at the state level in a music contest as an ensemble.

I'd better scoot....need to get dishwasher loaded and some picking up done before I have to run again. (I was going to add a picture this time but can't remember how to get it up...sorry)

Safely in Ontario tonight...waiting on my brothers to arrive back at Dad's. Boys are downstairs in our room hopefully asleep. We are up here just for the weekend to see Mom who has been in hospital since Jan 4. This weekend all the sibs are here together for a few hours. More another time...wanted to do a very quick note. Will hopefully be back commenting soon.

On a snow day today...school canceled due to freezing rain. There is nothing here yet but apparently on the main east/west highway south of here it is lightly raining and freezing on contact. I am rather glad I don't have to try to drive the bus in this...even though on my route it isn't likely to be too bad yet. It's the southern routes in the district that are bad.

Updates...Not really sure where to start so this will likely be rambling. Mom is still in the hospital...she has been diagnosed with Primary Lymphoma of the brain. Basically it started in the brain and as of now has not spread outside the brain. Chemo is hopefully going to be started yet this week...

Squirrel is doing pretty much the same with his hearing. The ENT had lots of tests done right there in the office - that was nice. At one point Squirrel looked at me and said "I think I failed Mom" - which pretty much was true as far as hearing stuff went. ENT said that he didn't have much hearing at all in that ear and wanted to try a course of steroids. If they helped then it would probably come back...if they didn't it likely would not. So...we have done the steroids and are scheduled to go back for more testing on the 26th and will get results the same day. I am not expecting any new news...and he is compensating very well.

B and Dipstick's passports arrived yesterday in the mail. So now if a trip north needs to be made that involves all of us it can be done.

Better scoot for now and try to get some stuff around the house done...Will try to do a sooner update - especially since I've taken some fun pictures recently.

Today was beautiful...cold, slightly, occasionally sunny...the trees were beautiful with their coating of "white ice". It wasn't the crystal clear ice I've seen in the past but ice mixed with snow. It's been kind of neat to hear the tinkling in the trees as the ice-coated branches rub against each other. It is still cold and we are under a winter storm advisory from the wee morning hours tomorrow until Friday afternoon.

Today overall has been a fairly productive day. I was able to get Squirrel an appointment with an ENT for tomorrow morning...I was surprised to get in so quickly but also thankful. That is one thing off my mind because at least we will hopefully find out if it's a temporary condition or a permanent one. I was also able to find the paperwork needed to apply for passports for B and Dipstick. I have some clothes laid out in case of needing to make a quick trip north.

Mom has been in the hospital since Monday. Right now my sister, brother and sister-in-law are there supporting Dad and Mom and I'm in a holding pattern. Doctors are not sure what the exact problem is.

I've got some stuff to finish before bed so had better go for now...have been waiting on a phone call and think I'm going to try calling for an update myself.

Happy New Year

Happy New Year! May 2010 be a year of growth and blessing to all.

This morning we have snow coming down...counties directly west and north of us are expected to have 8-12 inches last I checked so we will certainly get some. I confess I am rather hoping for more than less...my theory is that if it's going to be cold there ought to be snow on the ground.

The plan for this afternoon is to go pick up the first parts of the Hot Rod to be. We are starting with the body - a 38 Chevy pick-up. I have no good idea of what it will look like when we are finished but am thinking the process will be fun. I know that I always enjoy looking at finished ones more when there are pictures of where and what it came from so pictures there will be and maybe eventually an album with the pictures in them.

Dipstick today is picking up marshmallows from the marshmallow wars that were had here last night...Stretch got to enjoy playing games with the adults. Squirrel wasn't feeling overly well so he spent the evening in bed sleeping...he's likely in the best shape today as far as sleep is concerned. We had friends over...Suz, C and their 4 kids as well as another family with a couple of boys. I got to hold a 3 week old baby for much of the evening...and Stretch got diaper changing experience. Overall we had a good evening. It was close to 2:00 am before B and I got to bed though.

Squirrel and Stretch are both looking forward to going back to school next week. There will continue to be adjustments for Squirrel as he will still have some doctors appointments to face and learning to watch people when they talk. He is still having issues with no hearing in his left ear...we are hoping that it will eventually return but don't know at all. Dipstick is not looking forward to returning to school quite as much...he would usually rather be out working in the shop than in class.

Speaking of working in the shop...B is now officially self-employed. He was called back to do 5 engines at his old place of employment with no guarantees as to how long he would be there before being laid off again. So he said thanks but no thanks. I am confident that his place here is the best for him but it's still scary at times. We will definitely be learning new things and relearning others...trusting God to provide.

On that note...I'm stopping for now...trying to get pictures to load onto the computer and will post goals for 2010 another time.

Home

Well Squirrel and I are home now...he was released from the hospital yesterday afternoon. He is still wearing a cervical collar and will have to wear that until the 29th at the earliest. He is scheduled for some more testing to attempt to find out why he passed out in the first place...

At the moment he is pretty bored...finding creative ways to get around without having to have someone "walk" him. Tomorrow he will start doing some easy chores...just to keep him occupied. In the meantime I am playing catch-up from being gone so long.

Squirrel

Squirrel has been in the hospital here since coming into the ER on Wednesday night. He was eventually admitted to the Pediatric ICU for concussion, and hairline skull fracture. We will be here until he is able to keep a meal down and able to be up and walking without extreme dizziness and nausea. He finally is beginning ot eat more than ice chips...had a bowl of cereal for breakfast.

A Post??

Wow...it's been a very long time since I've posted anything...and I actually have pictures to post...but likely won't get to that tonight.

• Dipstick has broken his new glasses - that he's only had for a week and the eye doctor's place is closed tomorrow
  
• Dipstick's grades currently are not failing!!! This is awesome as he's been grounded for weeks due to failing grades & undone homework.
• I enjoyed an awesome visit with my sister and her children yesterday. B and I drove to Grand Rapids to meet them. We enjoyed lunch then went to the public museum. It was too much to comprehend all in one day but so much fun to look. We enjoyed a nice supper at the restaurant near their hotel then headed home.
  
• All 3 boys stayed home and went to school yesterday...was nice to spend the day just with B but equally nice to get home late(r) last night and see all the boys
• Belle and Boo are beautiful handsome children that are growing so rapidly...they took to B very well - so much so that he was surprised.
  
• Today was spend "recuperating" - I napped between bus routes and did laundry and dishes
• Tomorrow will be spent preparing for a home show that I'm hostessing here Friday evening.
• Stretch's fall play is over as is cross country...Life isn't slowing down much as the Gospel Choir schedule is picking up
• Squirrel is running 3-4 days a week after school - usually in town but occasionally at the high school. He prefers to run at the high school as he thinks it is more interesting
• My brother N and his wife I will be back from overseas for a month over Christmas...based near my mom and dad.
• Excitement is high as my mind frantically runs around thinking about whether we will be able to make it north to see them...and what I should be working on to take to them
• Still much concern over my Mom and Dad's health
• Crops are slowly being harvested
• Weather is still often rainy - today was misty and foggy most of the day. Was so thankful that we had a nice if chilly day yesterday
  
• Boys should be home from church soon

I am totally rambling now...think I will go look at the project I have in mind to deliver up north. Was looking through pictures earlier this evening...found 1 set that showed many of my stitching UFO's...maybe someday I'll get them finished.

First "real" meal I've had in 2 days tonight...I baked roast in the oven and made potatoes and veggies to go on the side. I had hoped that there would be enough roast left to do another meal but it doesn't appear so this time. Cookies are just coming out of the oven...I paid bills today and balanced checkbook. I also got some cleaning done and a short nap in. It was really nice to be off school today and Friday...especially since I was down sick with something Friday and Saturday. I haven't had more than 1 cup of coffee since Thursday afternoon...not sure how bad I want to go back to drinking it - at least as much of it as I was. We will see how tomorrow goes.

Dipstick is at boy scouts tonight...he's missed several times. Stretch is upstairs doing homework while Squirrel is watching military channel on tv and waiting on his turn on the computer. Squirrel helped out here quite a bit today...inside lifting and carrying laundry for me as well as outside doing stuff for B. The camper is covered for the winter, the canoe is up on the wall in the lean-to...stuff is getting done. We have plans for re-arranging the shop office...I'm kind of looking forward to getting that done though I'm not sure when it will happen.

Cross country is over for another year - Semi-state was Saturday. I was supposed to get to drive the bus for that but...thankfully Stretch and Squirrel got to go anyway...both riding the bus.

Brrr....

Brrrrr...it's cold here tonight. Actually it's been rather cold all day today though I did not light a fire during the day. Think tonight I will make sure it's stoked well before bed as tomorrow is supposed to be as cold as today was...and I like a warm house to wake up to.

B and Dipstick are watching tv tonight...the movie "Pearl Harbor". We have it on dvd but it's not one I've ever wanted to watch. Stretch and Squirrel are out tonight at youth group and should be back shortly. (Dipstick has been grounded due to his grades but his homework is done for tonight). This afternoon after school there were parent/teacher conferences at the high school. I really like how this school district does them - arena style with teachers paired up at tables. That way parents can visit with any teacher they wish to and skip some if necessary. Parent/teacher conferences are at the middle school for Squirrel next Wednesday night - same style. I much prefer this to just seeing one homeroom teacher out of several and getting notes on how the student is doing in the rest of the classes - in a 15 min. appointment. The other benefit to doing it arena style is that overall it seems to take less time to cover the teachers.

Boys are home so I'm getting booted off the computer...one goal for this weekend is to take pictures of all 3 boys outside somewhere - the weather is supposed to be better - not as cold and rainy.

My heart questions...

No half started posts at all recently...have thought about posting but just not got it done...Don't feel like I've got much done at all recently though the house is mostly clean.

My heart is somewhat heavy this morning...yesterday morning there was a serious car wreck involving at least 4 of "our" high school students...the school where Stretch attends and the district I work for. Two vehicles were totaled, 4 students were injured. Of those 4, one is in a drug-induced coma on life support and one has multiple breaks in his back and neck as well as internal bruising. The injuries of the other two students were more minor...cuts and bruises mainly. Rumors are swirling ... the gist of which is that there was some sort of racing going on - in the early morning darkness on a 2 lane country road - with possibly another vehicle that left the scene...one vehicle clipped another one and two rolled. Likely most of us will never know the exact story...authorities may have trouble figuring it out. But the results...lives forever changed...families...pain...loss...

I have trouble comprehending this...my heart questions why? All I can do is pray for those involved and believe that God will work it for good. Stretch commented that it really again makes you realize the frailty of life and how fast it can change.

He brews or why I don't do mornings

So this morning I'm trying to fix a fresh pot of coffee. I fill the reservoir with water, put a clean filter in...I grind the beans and push start. A few minutes later I wonder why my coffee is such a clear color...I know I ground the beans...Oh...wait a minute...did I put them in the filter?? Needless to say I hadn't.

There's a good reason why he brews in this house. (and it's not B it's usually Stretch that brews for me). The boys have learned to leave me mostly alone until I've had at least one cup of coffee.