What a difference a day makes - or in this case an overnight! Wow! Son2 got up this morning, showered, dressed, cheerful, did his chores, made his lunch and got ready for school - no fits, no tantrums, no fighting with his brother.....It was absolutely wonderful! (He was actually dressed before he came in to snuggle with me) I had him into bed last night - lights out - by 8:10 pm though he says he didn't go to sleep until after 8:30. Beyond that we didn't do anything different - he did not want to go to Wednesday night church and frankly I choose not to argue with him over that. I simply told him that he would be going to bed at 8:00 and I did not want to hear any whines about boredom or regretting not going. I didn't so that's a plus also. I know that he's looking forward to Erin's House tonight - to getting to go into the Tornado Room. Beyond that I have no idea what the difference was but I sure am thankful. It made for a much better morning for all of us. And last night I actually got to spend a few minutes cross stitching - probably about 15 but that's better than none.
I'm really thankful that we are able to get back to a regular schedule at Erin's House - I look forward to the contact with others who are in the same situation I am. I really struggle with being told that it's time to stop going there - stop rehashing the death and move on. I'm being told this by a friend who lost her first husband and is now remarried and has a baby. She never did end up taking her girls there and hasn't approved of us going there from the beginning. However I don't feel like I'm stuck reliving - I just need the support of being able to share with others for 2 hours a month. Son1 doesn't get to go because he has a cross country meet tonight - I will miss getting to watch that and having him wiht us. However it's important that Son2 and I go anyway.
On a different note - I saw 18 deer on the bus route this morning. Mostly it's in the usual groups of 2-3 at a time. However in one place we saw 6! (Actually I saw 19 but only 18 were while I had kids on the bus). Anyway it's really fun to look for them and keep count. The drive was beautiful - the sun came out yet there was these dark clouds in the background. I wish I could capture the scene in photography and words - the ripening fields of corn and soybeans, the dark clouds in the background and the sun's rays slanting across - making everything sharper and more vibrant.
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3 comments:
See, I'm reading blogs now. I still have about 10 emails to go through.
Forget about what certain others say about Erin's house. They are at a different place than you. Glad you could go.
And glad for the small improvement with Son2. Early to bed...
Love,
Me
Grief and healing can not be put on a timeline. It is not important how quickly you recover...only that you do. If going to Erins house helps you to do that, then go as long and as often as you need to.
Don't let anyone else tell you that you aren't entitled to what you are feeling.
I remember my own early morning bus rides during high school, especially in the winter. Our ride was about 1.5 hours (one-way!!) so I had a lot of time to read, reflect, and gaze out the window. The most spectacular views were always in the morning, especially during fall and winter, surprisingly. The way the sun (usually pink) lit up the frost-covered trees or highlighted the mist that rose from the little rivers and lakes here and there was unforgettable. :) I'm glad you get to enjoy that too!!
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